Sin Retention

What stuff, memories, sins, resentments are you retaining?

John 20:19-23
If we retain the sins of any, they are retained, Jesus tells us. Retain, retention, these aren’t big or complicated words but we don’t use them every day. What else do we talk about retaining?

• A retention officer in a workplace or school works to keep people around.
• We talk about retaining facts or memories.
  • So retention could be positive, but some memorable ways we talk about retention are more negative. Like retaining water. Bloating. Fluid retention simply sounds uncomfortable!

 Jesus says, “If you forgive the sins of any, they are forgiven them; if you retain the sins of any, they are retained.”

• This was so important to Jesus that he shows up in their midst after resurrection to tell them it was their time, their turn, their charge, to forgive each other.
• Think about being bloated with sins – our own or someone else’s.
• Why would we do it? Why would we make ourselves miserable by clinging to our judgments of other people, our complaints and criticisms of others?

Bob Ebeling worked with NASA as the 1986 Challenger mission approached, he and several other engineers realized that the weather would be too cold for a safe launch.

• Do you remember the Challenger lift-off? I actually don't, I wasn't even in school yet, but many of you witnessed it. What happened when the Challenger took off? O ring failed, too cold, shuttle broke apart.
• Well Bob and some of NASA's other engineers knew it wasn't safe, and he even considered bringing a shotgun into work with him because they couldn’t get anyone to take their concerns seriously. He wasn't planning to shoot anyone, he was just desperate to get someone's attention.
• Well, he didn't, the mission went forward, and with nearly a quarter of Americans watching on live TV, the Challenger exploded and all seven people aboard died.
• Bob lived with guilt and remorse the rest of his life. He retained guilt, he retained a sense of sin and shame for watching these seven astronauts and even a young teacher, die.
• Bob suffered deep depression, and quit his job with NASA soon after. For 30 years, he didn't know how to relieve himself of a huge burden of guilt. He was bloated with it. It defined him.
• He believed he didn't do his job well enough, he didn't make his case well enough, he should've tried harder. 30 years later, he told NPR "I think that was one of the mistakes that God made. He shouldn't have picked me for the job. But next time I talk to him, I'm gonna ask him, 'Why me. You picked a loser.' "
• It wasn't til after this story aired on NPR on the 30th anniversary of the Challenger explosion, so in 2015, that Bob found peace. He received an outpouring of grace from listeners who wrote to him saying he had done all he could. And then Bob finally found peace when a NASA representative contacted him to say he had done his best. And now Bob's daughter says she's seen a real change in him. "He doesn't have a heavy heart like he did."
• 30 years is too long to stay bloated, to retain sin, ours or someone else's. What sins are you ready to release? To forgive?

It's spring cleaning season, isn't it? How are you spring cleaning your heart? Your resentments? Your worries? Your guilt? Stir up what is stuck within your heart and offer God space, offer yourself fresh air. Release your hold on judgments and frustrations.

• And some literal spring cleaning might help, too. I've been getting ready to move, and when I look through boxes of old letters I find how well I've been loved in my life. I found a whole stack of letters that people from my church wrote to me when I was on a high school youth retreat. That is treasure.
• And I found letters from old friends who are no longer friends, due to distance or some long-ago conflict. My spring cleaning is my opportunity to dust off memories and relationships.
• Peter Marty writes: “Jesus tells a crowd that life does not consist in the abundance of possessions. I’m convinced that we confuse possessions with treasures. Moth and rust go after possessions; they can’t touch treasures. I possess my house; I treasure my home. I possess food in the fridge; I treasure nourishment. I possess a cell phone; I treasure connecting with people. I possess a car; I treasure the freedom it offers. I possess a heart; I treasure love."

Marty is referencing a parable from Luke 12, when Jesus describes a rich man with so much harvest that he tears down his barns to build bigger barns to store it all. The man thinks, '"And I will say to my soul, Soul, you have ample goods laid up for many years; relax, eat, drink, be merry.” But God said to him, “You fool! This very night your life is being demanded of you. And the things you have prepared, whose will they be?” So it is with those who store up treasures for themselves but are not rich towards God.’

• Just like our houses can become bloated with stuff, our hearts can become bloated with resentment, guilt, judgment. What sins are you retaining, your own, or each other's, that you can release? What does it prove about you or anyone else that you hold on to these sins? Are you ready to forgive each other?
• Breathe the Holy Spirit into your body like fresh air, spring cleaning your heart and soul.

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